a view from the edge (a post from Pastor Dawn)

When our son was about five years old, my husband walked into our two-story foyer to find him at the very top with one leg over the rail.  In this horrifying moment Frank discerned that our ever-adventurous child was attempting to be like GI Joe and propel himself off a mountain. 

Thankfully, Frank was able to calmly explain that he would more likely fall straight to the ground after which our son removed his leg from the rail and back to safety of the floor beneath him.  And I was grateful to come upon the scene seconds later, believing that my own fear, manifested in a flurry of words and emotion, might have made matters worse.

This memory came to my mind as I contemplated Pastor Stacey’s last two sermons on Ephesians 4 and what it means to live in unity with the community of believers.  While the case of a child about to jump from a ledge is an obvious call for loving intervention, I wonder how equipped we are as disciples of Christ to know when and how to intervene in other, less obvious circumstances.

This is an important question to ponder since the Apostle Paul is clear that we are to “bear with one another in love” (or more literally, “to put up with one another in love”), since to do so, according to the Apostle Paul, is no passive act!  Putting up with one another in love requires the Holy Spirit's wisdom and empowerment to know when to overlook the actions of another and when to do the challenging work of talking them off the ledge well!

Proverbs 19.11 states that, “it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” Yet numerous other Scripture references suggest this is not so when overlooking an offense is motivated by passivity or avoidance rather than a genuine desire to honor God in relationships with others.  Peacemaker Ministries offers three clear criteria, rooted in Scripture, to help us determine when overlooking an offense is a godly option.  They are:

• Has the offense created a wall between you and the other person for more than a short period of time?

• Is the offense causing serious harm to God’s reputation, others or to the offender?

• Is the offense part of a destructive pattern?

If any the answer to any of the above statements is yes, then overlooking the offense is not a biblical option.  Instead, you are likely being called to  the difficult work of talking someone off the ledge, regardless of how you feel about it.  But as Pastor Stacey said last Sunday, if you are all too eager to go... don’t!  Consider calling a godly friend or more mature believer, first.  Take the time to prepare -- through God's precepts and the prayers of others -- to go in such a way that we might all grow into the mature body of Christ as each part does it work.  


Let me pray for you …

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for providing a way to live in a covenant relationship with you and others through your Son, Jesus Christ. 

Forgive us, Lord, when we take that gift for granted.  Have mercy on us when our own sinfulness cause harm to one another whether through passivity or aggression. 

Help us to live together as you designed us – in unity and peace.  Grant that we might have the discernment and courage needed to do so by knowing when to overlook an offense and when to do the difficult work of speaking the truth in love. And may you meet us in those efforts with the peace and transformation that only your Spirit can bring. Amen.

Pastor Dawn Bodi